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Category: Maddie

Acceptance

Posted on January 24, 2020 by Andi

This story below has been on my mind and I can’t stop thinking about it. I have had similar things happen, but not to this extent and I just need to share it.

A man’s son (a 5 year old in kindergarten) wanted his nails painted and then got bullied at school for it. Before I say what my feelings are and why this resonates with me, I want you to read what this dad said.

When I read this I wanted to hug this little boy and high five his parents. This poor kid gets bullied and picked on by his peers for something as small as painting his nails. It breaks my heart.

My youngest is 5. He will be in Kindergarten in the Fall. And this boy loves his nails painted, tutus, skirts and all things glittery and sparkly. His favorite book is called “Just Add Glitter”. Now some people might say that he likes these things because he has two older sisters, or because I, myself, like to have my nails painted and LOVE glitter and sparkly things. But (1) his sisters are not very girly. Their dress-wearing is sporadic, they have buzzed undercuts on their hair, play hockey and softball and are both tough as nails! And (2) he just likes them. He isn’t pressured by his sisters to wear skirts, he just chooses them when he picks out his own clothes. Because they spin and sparkle and make him happy.

I also have a daughter who is 9 and she loves sports, video games, has short hair (because it makes her feel awesome!) and loves to ride her bike and rollerblade and go skating and skiing and is one of the funniest people I know. But she has been told that she “looks like a boy” because her hair is short. WHAT?! It makes me so sad.

Who are we or these kids to judge this and say it isn’t ok? Even into adulthood, women especially are judged for how they look or what they wear if it might not fit into the norm or just doesn’t appeal to one person. I am almost 40 and in my head I don’t give a damn what people say or think about me, but I know that I do to some extent.

And my son and this boy above are 5! I’m an adult and I can handle it. But these kids are just learning who they are, finding themselves and learning to love themselves. So it makes me so sad that this happens.

I know this happens. I am naive enough to think that “this won’t happen to my kid” or “things will change” or “it’ll be ok”. It can hurt. And it sucks when my kid comes home and tells me that someone said “skirts are for girls”. No they freaking aren’t. They are for anyone that wants to freaking wear them.

Let me digress briefly about toys being gendered. This makes me INSANE! My kids (both girls and boy) play with EVERYTHING! They dress up, play with pretend food, play all kinds of games, play with doll houses, play with dolls, play with cars, play with LEGO, play sports, play video games, play with PlayDoh, etc. And never once have they said they can’t play with something because it’s “for a boy” or “for a girl”. I know my husband and I would have a conversation with them if they did, but we raised them to know that TOYS ARE TOYS. There are not boy-toys or girl-toys. Just like it is nonsense that blue is for boys and pink is for girls. I have many male adult friends I have seen wear pink. And my girls rock blue all the time!

The picture at the beginning of this post was from a couple weeks ago. I was working and I needed my son to play by himself for a while. I snapped a couple pictures and a video of him playing and it was so sweet. I loved listening to the way the parents talked to the kids, the voices he used for mom, dad, kids and just how he made everyone interact. It really shows what goes through their heads as you see them play with these things. The parents were nurturing, the siblings in his pretend house we helpful and I was so proud of the interactions I overheard. And I never would have gotten this sweet moment if I had told him “Alex, that dollhouse isn’t for you to play with, it is for your sisters.”

It is hard to talk to your kids about these things. And not hard in the sense that I don’t know what to say, but hard that I HAVE to tell them “don’t worry about what people say”, “don’t listen to them”, “you can like anything you like”, “you are beautiful”, “you are you and you are amazing and spectacular”, “tell those kids that it’s ok to like what you want and it is ok that they don’t like the same things”. And for the most part, this works, We have very emotionally strong kids, but it still makes my heart hurt that these things even need to be said.

We need to get our heads out of the clouds and stop thinking in this way of the past. It is 2020. We should be above this. Shouldn’t we have bigger things to worry about than what color our kids are wearing, what toys they are playing with or if they want to accessorize themselves?

So stop and listen to yourself when you are talking to your kids. It is not ok to put this pressure on them. They need to see they are loved and accepted for any choices they make. Someday they will be older and have much bigger and harder things they are dealing with than whether someone says they shouldn’t wear nail polish and you will want them to be able to come to you about it and not be embarrassed. So step up your game and make sure you are teaching your children acceptance. And maybe it will be a good refresher course for you as well.

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Maddie’s Birthday Weekend

Posted on February 21, 2017February 21, 2017 by Andi

We had lots of fun celebrating our big 6 year old this past weekend.Β  On Saturday morning, Chuck and Maddie worked on making a birthday cake. She wanted to make and decorate her own cake this year. Chuck helped her bake and she did the decorating. (One was chocolate and the other cake was rainbow with white frosting.) She was so proud of herself!

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Saturday afternoon, we had a girls outing and went to see Fancy Nancy at the Stages Theatre. It was a really cute show with lots of singing and dancing by kids. The girls loved it. We took my mom, my mother-in-law, sister-in-law and niece.

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The amazing Grandma Linda made Maddie a Merida dress (from the Disney movie Brave). Now, here is a picture of the image she was modeling the dress after:File_000

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I honestly think hers is even better than the ones you can buy in the stores. Amazing!

That evening we had some family over to celebrate and eat all the cake Maddie made. She also got a few other Merida accessories to go with her dress. So cute!

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Then on Sunday she wanted to go to brunch. So we took her there and then we went to the Mall of America because she wanted to go to the Crayola Experience and spend some birthday money. We had also planned to ride rides, but since it was a holiday weekend, it was really busy there and we decided to skip rides.

On Monday, I had plans to meet a friend at the mall (we knew it would be a potentially terrible idea with everyone in town planning to be there, too). So we took the kids on some rides and had lunch. Since it was President’s Day there were some events going on and the kids got crowns and got their picture with some presidents. Winking smile

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After lunch at the mall, we went to our friend’s house to hang out for the afternoon. It was a fun-filled day (and weekend) and we were all exhausted by the end of it. I think Maddie had a great birthday filled with fun, family and friends!

Now we are thankfully back to our regular schedule. Smile

andi

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6

Posted on February 16, 2017February 16, 2017 by Andi

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Maddie turned 6 today. 6!? I can’t seem to wrap my brain around this! When I put her to bed last night, I cried a little knowing she wouldn’t be 5 in the morning.

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She’s grown into such a wonderful, kind, caring girl. She has flourished in Kindergarten and has made so many new friends. Her teacher always has wonderful things to say about her. And she loves school, which is such a wonderful thing.

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She decided she didn’t want to have a birthday party this year. But because she’s really turning 60, she did want to go to brunch. So we are going to do that this weekend. Her other request was for mom and dad (no brother and sister allowed) to take her to the Crayola Experience and ride rides at the MOA.Β  So that’s what we are doing.

We gave her a few presents today and we are also seeing Fancy Nancy with a couple grandmas, and aunt and a cousin.

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It has been kind of nice not planning a big birthday party for her. I am hoping to continue this trend if I can. Or at least have smaller parties than I usually throw for them. (I have a tendency to go overboard.)

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Maddie is smart, sassy, silly and has a style all her own. She is timid yet strong-willed and can be a spitfire when she needs to be.

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So, our little baby is 6. It’s weird to think about all that has happened in 6 years and what a crazy time her birth was. Our baby is growing up and becoming less of a baby everyday. She is starting to think I’m a little nuts (she’s not wrong) and before we know it she’ll be off to college (sob)!

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Happy birthday little tater tot. We love you!

andi

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June!?

Posted on December 21, 2016January 29, 2017 by Andi

It’s December 21. I last wrote almost exactly 6 months ago on June 22nd. Not for lack of thinking about ye old blog here, but I just haven’t done it. Something else has come up or something else needed to be done. I’m going to have to make a serious list of all the things that need to be documented on here. Since I am so crappy about making baby books for my kids, the least I can do is document some of their childhood here. Smile

Wishing you all a happy holidays! Our xmas card (if you can call it that) is below. We decided not to send one out this year. I’m just posting it virtually online. Save a tree, right? Or laziness. Whatever works.

xmas2016

andi

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A Visit From Seattle

Posted on April 7, 2016January 29, 2017 by Andi

Our long-time friend, Kelly, and her daughter, Aria, came to visit us a couple weeks ago. I literally squealed when she told me she booked a flight here and was even more excited when she decided to stay with us! That meant loads of baby snuggles and Kelly-time!

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Chuck also made his best batch EVER of pretzels!!!

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We went to one of her favorite restaurants one night for dinner. It was fun to bring all the kids there. Thankfully, it’s not a super classy joint, so we weren’t bothering anyone with all the kids (whom were all very well-behaved). We also spent a morning at the zoo and had lunch at Noodles.

The kids were really good with Aria and liked to play with her. Maddie was especially loving of her…and Aria liked Maddie a lot!

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It was a brief, but wonderful trip. I am so thankful that she came all the way here (after staying a number of days in Georgia) to see us and let us meet her sweet little girl!

I am hoping to plan a trip out during Chuck’s July trip to Seattle. I am really excited to go out and see some of my dear friends there! It’s so good to be back home in MN, but I still miss my friends there. Thankfully, 2016 makes it pretty easy to stay in touch with each other!

andi

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Superhero Party

Posted on March 11, 2016February 1, 2017 by Andi

This year Maddie knew exactly what kind of birthday party she wanted…. β€œa Superhero party with ice cream cake!” So that’s exactly what she got!

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We invited family and a few friends over and it was so fun and simple. I got a bunch of capes for the kids (and a few extras for adults to play with), made a photo booth backdrop and cut out masks and such. We played Kids Bop music and ordered pizza and ate DQ cake. It was perfect!

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Grandma Linda made more amazing gifts this year. She made Maddie her very own superhero cape, headband and wrist bands and a Barbie tent/sleeping bags/campfire! She is SO creative! The kids were fascinated by the Barbie stuff.

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Thanks to our family and friends that could be there (or sent gifts in lieu of your presence) and helping to make this girl one very happy superhero!

HERE is a link to the photo gallery from the party.

andi

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Maddie is 5!

Posted on February 24, 2016January 29, 2017 by Andi

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Our baby girl turned 5 last week! 5!!!! I am not an overly sentimental person. I don’t keep every piece of art the kids make or many of the things most parents would keep. But there was something about putting Maddie to bed for the last time as a 4 year old that just turned me into a sobbing mess. I could barely hold it together when I was kissing her good night. It’s not like me at all.

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The cutest part was in the morning after we woke her up and I was making her breakfast (blueberry muffins), she said β€œmom, I don’t feel any different. I have a different number, but nothing has really changed.” She’s so smart. I told her that’s kind of how birthdays are. You get older, but don’t feel different when you wake up. She didn’t like that. I think she thought she was going to magically feel completely different. Children are so cute and innocent.

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She brought cupcakes to school that morning and then later in the day we opened presents. She had some leftover ice cream cake from her birthday party the previous weekend (I’ll post about that soon) and otherwise had a pretty low-key day.

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But she’s 5! 5!!!! I think it was hard for me this time because I signed her up for kindergarten right before her birthday. Something about knowing your kid will be taking the bus and heading to school all day was a shock to my system.

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We also got her first haircut a couple days after she turned 5.

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Our sweet girl is 5 and is really turning into a remarkable little girl. She’s so sweet and caring to her brother and sister. She’s helpful and understanding. She loves learning. She smart and curious and loves to know how things work. She’s very crafty and creative. And she’s the silliest little girl!

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We love her so very much! Even if she is a little strange. Smile

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First Haircuts

Posted on February 22, 2016January 29, 2017 by Andi

Maddie got her first haircut. You read that right. She’s 5 and she just got her first haircut. I wasn’t ready to cut her hair. But then it’s been so hard to manage lately and it made her so upset to brush her hair, I knew it was time. So we took her in to get a haircut. Here are before and after pictures.

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When I first looked at the pictures it didn’t look like she had very much cut off. But then we did a side-by-side picture and when you look where the bottom of her shirt is, you can see that quite a bit was taken off. Smile

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It’s so much nicer now and so much more manageable. I know I should have done it sooner, but now she has more crazy mom ammunition for later in life.

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And as if cutting Maddie’s hair didn’t send me over the edge, I decided to get Alex’s hair cut as well. And Alex went first, so the 15 month old got a haircut before the 5 year old. You can call me ridiculous now. Smile

Maddie was a trooper and didn’t make a peep or anything. Alex, well, he cried the whole time. But he was mostly mad that I was holding down his hands. He calmed down as soon as he got the plastic cover off him and I let him out of the chair.Β  Here are his before and after pictures.

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I wanted him to have a mohawk, but knew that I wouldn’t keep it up and style it everyday, so I had her keep it longer, but she still styled it that way for me. By the time we got home, though, the mohawk had fallen down. Here’s one I snapped before we left.

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This place saved a clipping of their hair in a little envelope. The lady who did Maddie’s hair commented that was one of the biggest amounts of hair they cut for a first haircut. Haha.

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Overall, it wasn’t as traumatizing for me as I thought it would be. And now I can brush Maddie’s hair without a fight and Alex just looks like a little man. Smile Now maybe just another year or two before Dannie gets her first haircut. Smile

andi

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Fall Play Date Fun

Posted on October 26, 2015 by Andi

We went to my friend Mallory's house to hang out last week. We hang out there quite a bit. At least once a week. I actually took a few pictures this time. Our kids all pay so nicely together! The second picture is from a different day, but it was just so cute.

We also made these Berry Bars while I was there. The kids had fun helping and eating them.

Just before it was time to leave, we took them outside to play in the leaves for a few minutes. Of course, I couldn't get all my kids to look at the camera at the same time no matter how hard I tried. Typical.

The girls played hide and seek and found a worm!

 

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Monster Treats

Posted on October 21, 2015 by Andi

Last week we went to a friend's house to make a little Halloween treat. She found the idea here on Pinterest. These were really easy to make and the kids had a lot of fun. We decided to make them with Fruity Pebbles because her daughter doesn't like Rice Crispies. This was a delicious substitution!

You just make crispie bars, melt some chocolate, then decorate. Easy easy easy. Goofy faces and thumbs up were had by all.

After the treats, the girls had Alex chasing the remote control car around. It was the funniest thing. πŸ™‚

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minihays

Dannie and I finished this lovely puzzle (that I g Dannie and I finished this lovely puzzle (that I got at @birchbark_books) last week when she was home sick. I wasn’t feeling great either, so we spent most of the day on the couch, puzzling, while we both listened to our own audiobooks. ❀️🎧🧩
Here are the books I read in February. More on eac Here are the books I read in February. More on each of the books can be found on @minihaysreads. πŸ“š
Alex * Mite 2 * 2022-2023 πŸ’β€οΈ Alex * Mite 2 * 2022-2023 πŸ’β€οΈ
Dannie * 10UA * 2022-2023 πŸ’β€οΈ Dannie * 10UA * 2022-2023 πŸ’β€οΈ
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minihaysreads

A delightful story about a mom and daughter, the u A delightful story about a mom and daughter, the ups and downs of a relationship with your teen, a successful single mom, and both trying to figure out where they belong and what truly makes them happy. I love everything I've read by Waxman. She never disappoints! 

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”πŸ“šβ€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
Check this one out if you’re looking for a feel good book with a mom and daughter.
β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”πŸ“šβ€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”

πŸŽ§πŸ“š(39) #minihaysreads2023 #book #books #bookreader #booklover #audiobook #listentobooks #bookstagram #read #booknerd #bibliophile #MarchReads #MarchBooks #bookaddict #bookworm #ilovetoread #ilovebooks #IWasToldItWouldGetEasier #AbbiWaxman
My daughter got this book from one of her coaches My daughter got this book from one of her coaches at their end of the year hockey party. What a fabulous gift! β€οΈπŸ“–πŸ’
Dannie and I finished this lovely puzzle (that I g Dannie and I finished this lovely puzzle (that I got at @birchbark_books) last week when she was home sick. I wasn’t feeling great either, so we spent most of the day on the couch, puzzling, while we both listened to our own audiobooks. ❀️🎧🧩
This book is an upcoming book club pick. I had it This book is an upcoming book club pick. I had it available so I read it early. It was so so good! It was about history, heritage, life, love, loss, family, traditions, ancestors and remembering. Just so beautiful. 

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”πŸ“šβ€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
Check this one out if you enjoy books about Native American heritage and history.
β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”πŸ“šβ€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”

πŸŽ§πŸ“š(38) #minihaysreads2023 #book #books #bookreader #booklover #audiobook #listentobooks #bookstagram #read #booknerd #bibliophile #MarchReads #MarchBooks #bookaddict #bookworm #ilovetoread #ilovebooks #TheSeedKeeper #DianeWilson
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haysonthelake

Snow, snow and more snow. My youngest stands almos Snow, snow and more snow. My youngest stands almost even with the mailbox! But the lake is low, so we will take all the snow!
Hi! Remember me? I’ve been MIA for quite some ti Hi! Remember me? I’ve been MIA for quite some time and I’ve got LOTS of catching up to do. πŸ™‹β€β™€οΈ
No one is ever really ready for snow, but I love t No one is ever really ready for snow, but I love those first sprinkles. πŸ’™β„οΈ
I will never tire of (or stop posting) sunrise pic I will never tire of (or stop posting) sunrise pictures. πŸŒ…
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